Is Compatibility Important in Relationships?

If you are here, I’m assuming you’ve met someone or probably met someone you genuinely love and want to spend your life together. When we find someone who is compatible with us, we automatically find that person more attractive, develop better intimacy and bond, and establish a good friendship. It is clear that compatibility matters. But do you often find yourself thinking about whether your relationship is compatible or not and why is compatibility important in relationships? Then you are not alone. We will be discussing what compatibility is and whether compatibility is really important in relationships

How to Define Relationship Compatibility

Relationship compatibility is an important factor to consider when getting romantically involved with someone. It’s important for romantic couples to have fun together and enjoy the time they spend together. Relationships thrive when two people share activities and companionship. However, a couple doesn’t have to have every common interest. Similarly, a couple can’t build a healthy relationship if they are poles apart. So, a perfect option is somewhere in between. The partners should be independent personalities who have their outlooks in life but their views on major things match. 

Relationship compatibility is important for long-term relationship success. But you shouldn’t be with someone just because they seem a great match. One should know the difference between being in a compatible relationship and a loving one. This can prevent them from staying in a relationship that isn’t built on genuine feelings. Compatibility in relationships means that you have a strong friendship, great support, and companionship.

Compatibility does not mean that you won’t have problems in your relationship. Issues will always be there in any relationship; no one is perfect. But there are many potential partners you may be compatible with, with whom you could live a better peaceful life. 

Areas of Compatibility

1. Priorities in Life

Where do you see both of yourselves in the next five to six years? Is it a successful corporate life or living your days on a mountain? Does one of you want to have kids, while the other wants a worry-free life?

2. Preferences

Are there activities you both indulge in? Is any one of you comfortable living in a dumpster while the other is a clean freak? Does one turn up to dates on time while the other is not at all punctual?

3. Values

Our values are the origin from which most of the above flow. If your values do not align with your significant other’s, that is bad news for you.

These are the prime factors that you should consider and discuss with your partner.

Is Compatibility Important in Relationships?

The success of any relationship is established by many factors, but the compatibility of partners is one of its key elements. Falling in love can lead to a good relationship, but love is not everything, one thing is still needed for the relationship to work and truly last: Compatibility. When a relationship lacks enough compatibility, it may break down after a few months or years. We often see people get a divorce simply because they are not happy when they’re with someone they’re not compatible with. Most of us are drawn to someone for unconscious reasons based on adaptations and experiences from our childhood. 

We often choose partners who treat us like we are treated in our family so our adaptations fit. On an unconscious level, we tend to look for people who are not ideal for us. For example, if you’re quiet and pick a loud partner, you may fail to speak for yourself. You may accept all your partner’s decisions and let them dominate the relationship, not giving your opinion or getting what you want. 

At first, these things may seem comfortable and familiar. But later on, partners often become resentful and angry about the same traits of their partner that at first seemed so alluring. When we connect based on traits (unhealthy) that fit together, the reasons we are attracted to a person eventually become the reason that person repels us. This is where compatibility is needed. When we look for someone who “completes” us, we tend to limit ourselves and our personal growth. Instead, we should pick people who challenge us and help us evolve. We should take chances with people who, at first, may make us uncomfortable because they show more interest and care for us than we are familiar with. In terms of healthy relationships, compatibility means being truly happy with one another.

We see couples completely in love with each other sometimes end up with break ups because they can not exist happily together. At the same time, some couples lack that excitable passion for being in love but compatibility can keep them together. 

Compatibility in Relationships is more important than ever before

The divorce rate is rising everywhere, including in conservative India, where taboos against divorce until recently have been extreme. Divorce happens when you hit indifference — when you do not see yourselves as able to coexist happily with one another in the long run. That is when you stop caring for each other. It’s not because couples stop loving each other but because they lack that compatibility. 

Here are six reasons why compatibility plays a major role in a relationship.

1. Partners should be equal

There are many unhealthy relationships where a man or woman is greatly emotionally dependent on his or her partner. This is a harmful dependency, for only two integrated personalities can make their relationship work. This is one of the ways compatibility embodies itself.

2. Physical intimacy should be there

No doubt, physical chemistry and intimacy are important parts of a long-term relationship. Partners should be compatible not only in terms of interests and lifestyles but also in bed. However, sexual compatibility should not be prioritized because if a relationship is solely based on sexual compatibility, it most likely doesn’t have a future. In the long run, the partners are going to realize that there is no point in continuing their relationship if they don’t have other qualities of a compatible couple apart from having physical intimacy.

3. Appearance is Temporary

We often choose our partners by looks but making a decision based only on looks is a mistake. But when we grow up and become mature, our priorities change, and we start looking for the one who will share the same values and similar views on life. As time passes, people’s looks undergo some changes, but the inner world of a person stays mostly the same. That is why the compatibility of souls is so important in a relationship.

4. A sense of humor only makes it better

Being able to laugh together is another important component of a long-lasting relationship. Couples that have the same sense of humor are generally happier. Suppose any of the two partners in a relationship wants to get childish for a while or banter with their significant other. In that case, they shouldn’t feel afraid of possible misunderstanding on their partner’s part. They should be comfortable with each other in any situation. 

5. The Compatibility of Backgrounds

Different social groups mean different outlooks in life. It’s a proven fact that partners that have similar backgrounds make better couples. The explanation is simple as they have the same level of education and similar values. Compatibility in background hugely contributes to the success of a relationship.

6. Communication

Being in a relationship, be it romantic or platonic, with people who make us feel heard, seen, and loved is one way to satisfy our needs as human beings. But if we can’t even open up about what those needs are to our significant others, we can’t expect the person to fulfill or even understand them on their own. That’s why communicating our needs and priorities in any relationship is crucial; while doing so, we’re using our words to foster intimacy as well as repair cracks in the relationship.

How To Find a Partner With Relationship Compatibility?

Ironically, achieving compatibility in relationships often means thinking or doing things outside your comfort zone. The most vital thing to consider in your decision is to choose someone you really like being around, who makes you comfortable and supports you. You should not place unnecessary restrictions on the choices, for instance, excessively limiting your choices by age, job, income, etc. It is better to be open-minded even when we get hurt instead of becoming pickier or to place more complicated criteria for a potential compatible partner.

You Don't Find Compatibility, You Build Compatibility

Humans are clearly designed to connect and get primed from day one for friendships, intimacy, and falling in love in the types of core compatibilities. There is no single person who you will be compatible with in every little way. But, any healthy relationship is not magically formed; they’re built with love, time, and effort. 

So, in terms of Compatible Relationships, it is essential to simply care for each other and to consistently like, support and respect as autonomous individuals.

Therefore, Compatibility in Relationships is actually more of a mindset, not a set of shared traits.

So, these are all the core reasons why compatibility is so important for any successful relationship. We at Inside Ink Graphology Solutions greatly value these aspects and provide reliable Handwriting and Compatibility analysis, which lets you understand exactly how your partner is, where your relationship stands, overcome any obstacle together, or evaluate your compatibility with your partner. 

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She is a certified Graphologist since 2002 and is an expert in designing customized remedies to help her clients overcome various life issues like finance troubles, career growth, education, relationship problems, anxiety, guilt, fear and health issues like back pains, digestion/stomach related issues etc. She has done her M.Tech in IEOR from IIT Bombay. Her one-on-one guidance and customized solutions ensure that all her clients succeed and develop at a fast pace who come from all walks of life including entrepreneurs, students, business professionals, housewives, retirees, white-collar and blue-collar workers.